Once In A Blue Moon

Hey you, yes I mean Y-O-U, who actually has set your eyes on my title and continued to read on. Please click ‘read more’ and help me out with the purchase of a new hp!

Reason: My hand-me-down nokia (I deserved it coz I post my 2nd hp in 2 months) is really in a bad shape. The last straw on the camel back happened yesterday night,when the screen came off after experience a ‘free fall’ from my table.

Budget: RM 500- RM 700
(fine, the truth is, dad said Rm 380 at first bcoz his hp cost that much; but I managed to raise it to 500. And I am setting the bar high because I do NOT mind subsidizing it myself with paycheque from work & manjaness on parents)

Brand: Samsung, Nokia, Sony  Ericsson

(My first hp was a flip samsung and I bought it bcoz of ‘love at first sight’ at ikano power centre. I didn’t get there okies, I got it much cheaper in sungei wang. Sob, I lost it in the Rainforest Musical Festival in Sarawak.

2nd hp was a Sony Ericsson K500 which didn’t last me long bcoz I was absent-minded at that time.

3rd hp is the current hand-me-down Nokia..err, more appropriately, hand-me-up bcoz it belonged to my 2nd sis)

Features that I want (Priority in descending order):
1. Colour (DUH!!)

2. Must be able to display chinese

(I am NOT used to smsing in chinese but then u can’t stop my friends from sending me smses in chinese. So if my hp can support thai, bahasa indon and bahasa malaysia, I do not see why chinese is not in my list. My first samsung hp does NOT support chinese!!)

3. Blue tooth & infra-red

4. MP3 (Item 3 will lead to this right?)
I want my hp to be able to play true tones!

5 .Radio

6. Camera (do not really care but it is a bonus)

What I have in mind:
Sony Ericsson Z520i ,K 750i

Nokia 7370, 7360
(LOVE these 2 L’amour series!!)

I would really appreciate it if u can recommend any worth-buying models to me, based on personal experience or comments from friends. You may ignore the price in making suggestions, however, do know that I cannot afford some RM 1 K ++ hp ya!!

You may tell me more about the models I have in mind too!! Thanks a lot!

p/s: A book review and thoughts after reading on ‘PS I Love You’ coming up soon….

They say time whizzed past when you are having fun or spending it wisely. That is how I feel about semester 3; just like a bittersour past with a two-faced HELP guy that ended in late june, the semester that began in early July has come to an end before I realised it, just like how the guy has turned from someone who mutually confide in me to a jackass who is thrown to an abyss of darkness, with the hope that he will drown in his own’ fantasy’ one day.(refer to ‘The Man In The Iron Mask’)

Overview of an Eventful Semester 3

1. To begin with, I HATE double-strength chloroform water. Why? Because thanks to that, I did NOT dilute it to single strength in my extemporaneous dispensing class test this morning (70% to finals). I thus fail ONE product-that Paediatric Ferrous Sulphate Oral Solution. We are required to prepare 3 products and in order to pass the module, we HAVE To pass at least two.

To think that I thought I did pretty well in the exam, horror stuck me as I stepped out of the lab and staphy asked me if I did dilution. *heartbroken*. I am praying hard that my quite well-done extemporaneous class test will NOT go down the drain; please let me pass this module the first time, I do NOT want to resit =( as much as I like making creams, solutions, suppositories, emulsions, etc.

2. I am more organised and systematic in my work, i.e. I have found back the gianwanness!! And I no longer leave  my notes   most of my notes till the last minute for highlighting. Notice I said highlighting, the ‘digestion’ of notes always come before a class tests.

3. People said I am outspoken and ‘always see you around with a smile’. ^_^ This is contrary to back then in sem1, due to something I do not wish to elaborate here. It is an unconcious change, I guess when I am with nice people, the smile just exudes from the bottom of my heart.

4. I find that I click better with guys and most of them are from medic or mpharm. I no longer have a group of girl friends like last time; I do have a few girl friends whom I can have deep conversation with in my batch. However, it is a pity that I do not get to hang out with my guy friends, who are always there to lend a listening ear, and who have been really interesting people who can carry a 2-way conversation with me. ^_^

As mentioned in my private blog, I wish I can carry forward not only the friends, but also the increasing value of the friendship (just like how you carry forward the interest in bank account with each month). as we move from one phase to another in life.

5. It is a funny thing that the guy who made me cry twice last time was the one who ‘discovered’ my ‘flair’ in debate and kept bugging me to go for it. I think he has changed a bit in his tactlessness. And we have been in equilibrium with each other. This reminds me of how andrew and I, and minghong and I back then in mc….haha…those were the days..They are now my close friends…

Ironically, the guy whom I think is tactful, gentleman and sincere, turned out to be a bugger who asked 3 girls out at the same time. (he asked 2 girls out at the beginning of the year, and another 2 months ago).

Moral of the story: Things may not always seem what they are on the surface.

6. I never thought I would join any club amidst the hectic schedule of bpharm. This is because I am a person who will  try to commit myself once I have set my heart to something, and weekly meetings just take up a lof of my msn, resting and blogging studying and report-completing time. However, I discovered my newfound interest in debate due to IMU cup, and I have surprised ka keat by staying back 7pm-9 pm every monday.

Yesterday I surprised mysellf yet again when wen leong persuaded me to join the badminton club. I am never a sports person, I wish I were. However, I decided to join because dad always nag me about not exercising; and since I am on study break now, I do not mind going back to uni every sat for practice. Wen Leong said that he will not laugh at my lack of skills, so wl you had better keep your promise!!

7. Another big ‘breakthrough’; will be reciting my winning poem in front of so many people at the atrium. I feel happy to be able to contribute to Pharmacy, for I am the only winner in english poetry who is from pharmacy ^_^ I realised that I am someone who can really put aside something to reach her goals-I decided to recite the poem anyway though I was in the midst of a mock exam, and the poem was no longer bittersweet as intended at the time I penned it due to the hurtful truth I found out a week before the recital.

Here is to all my fellow bpharmers, as well as my mpharmer friends who are going to have study break, all the best in our revisions, and let’s kick the papers’ asses in the finals!! See you ALL in the next semester!!

Some times, just when you thought you know the truth, more shocking truth come pouring onto you; like the torrential rain during a haze, it can be harsh, yet it is for the better because only then can your life be cleared of ‘haze’.

You know what one of my pet peeves is? It is insincere people. So what would you have felt like, if you were dragged on by some guy who is irresponsible at heart but put on a ’shy, innocent’ mask? What would you felt like, if you realised that things didn’t work out NOT because he didn’t want commitments or that he lost feelings for you, but it was because he was seeing AT LEAST TWO girls one-one-one and you are his back-up?
Worse, how would you feel, if you knew that, you are NOT only his victim??

Then, all those things that he did in the past seem utterly pretentious and insincere. The feeling is one of helplessness, of betrayal, hurt, disappointment and pissed-offness.

Helplessness because you guys were ‘not a couple, but more than friends’ so there wasn’t any obligations on his side, technically speaking. So you really are not in the position to say that he has commited infidelity or worse, use the word ‘2-timing’

Betrayal because you feel like you have been cheated of your genuine emotions and gestures. Leave the guy-girl scenario and try to think of a friendship situation; I am sure you will be so devastated to know that someone whom you trust and confide in , and befriended genuinely has been a two-faced person.

Hurt because you have to deal with many questions yourself.
"But he is a shy guy…..’
‘How could he be such a person? It is just hard to believe’
Suddenly, all the sunshine days that he seemingly had brought to you seemed to be sucked into a black hole- an abyss of darkness.

Disappointment because you have misjudged a person. You are disappointed with yourself for falling into his trap, and you are disappointed with him for you would have never in your wildest dream, imagined him to be such a person.

Pissed-offness because you feel like you have been a fool. And it makes it worse when the only thing the irresponsible guy could say is something like, ‘Sorry for the trouble and sorry for the misunderstanding’

The last straw will be knowing that he too, has hurt your girl friend. Your friend is someone who, unlike you, have not had buddy guy friends all this while and the interaction she has had with guys, as she told you, is minimal.

So imagine the amount of hurt that she has to endure, just to stop convincing herself that he is a guy who will NEVER do such a thing.
Imagine how shattered her heart is, when she found out that he is dating HER OTHER FRIEND. Imagine how she feels when she cannot tell her friends what has happened, just like me back then in college, because ‘we were not anything. There wasn’t a commitment and that you, being silly you, have to think about your other girl friend’s feelings who happens to be his gf now.

So can you all see the whole scenario now? in just 9 months time, he could date at least 3 girls at the same time; I said at least because I have never imagined the 3rd girl would pop up-so I won’t be surprise if there is a 4th or 5th; it was already shocking and hurting that there was another girl. The guy can say something like
" That is a DIFFERENT case; so please stay out of it" to justify his wrongdoings.

*roll my eyes* My girl friend and I are decent girls who are NOT desperate for attention from guys. We are NOT like him, so desperate for a girlfriend when he is stuck in the pits of the uni place, with his hengdais in australia, manchester and pj (some already have girlfriends; thus he started preying on girls from the same college;the irony thing is, these girls KNOW EACH OTHER since they have been in the same class, one time or another.

So how ‘different’ could it be? That she misreads his signals as well when they jolly well didn’t talk to each other back then in college, and all of a sudden during her summer break, he smsed her and asked her out. BUGGER.

Click on this pic for the enlarged version if
u wish-this is NOT to disclose someone’s privacy, but to safeguard my
interest in case he decided to hurt me for the THIRD time and tell
people I was the one after him. After all, I did NOT say who it is also
what, and there is a list of names there. There are more of his mails
in the next page which I just deleted (gonna delete this one too
now)-the girl reminded me about my inbox when she told me the bugger
replied her mail. You see, I usually keep my personal mail as u can see
in the screen, don’t know why also as I hardly re-read them.

The lamest thing is, he used the same phrase to me and her and did similar things.He wished us happy birthday on friendster(what a chicken!!) last year when he had not much interaction with us.
After the clarification, he told my girl friend ‘Sorry for all the trouble and sorry for misleading you.’

My dear friends out there, you may think that I am blogging about him because I have not fully let go. Rest assured. I want to share my misfortunate experience with you all out there so that you all will learn the lesson that I learnt (but NOT in the harsh way that I have learnt).

Why will I bother to keep my grudges and wallow in self-pity when I am living a hectic but happy uni life, meeting decent guys and learning different things?

A few quotable quotes by friends and I:

‘The girl who loves you more than I do is not prettier than me, the girl who is prettier than me doesn’t love you more than I do’

‘In life, you have to meet some shit (read: the guy) to evolve a stronger person.’

‘Guys like him are everywhere; just be thankful that you are not his girlfriends’

Gosh, that last quote from a friend is so true indeed!! Say I have a boyfriend and I found out that he had been 3-timing at least, while he was dating me. I will be so hurt because I take it as he doesn’t love me enough, or that he can’t decide who he loves more. And if he can do it once, he can do it many times more….  So if he brings me more sadness than happiness, why would I continue that meaningless, no-where-close-to-sacred relationship?

And my dear girl friend, if your boy friend is treating u exceptionally well, do suspect something-suspect that he is trying to make up for his guilt of triple-dating, or suspect that he is laying the bricks for reconciliation in future, in case you, as his girl friend, finds out the heartbreaking truth like the other 2 girls. By treating you exeptionally well, in future if you find out that he was seeing other girls when he was asking you out, he can fend his selfish act by saying:

‘In the end I CHOSE YOU. That is all that matters. I was just fooling around with them. Why would they think I liked them when I didn’t say ‘I like you’?’

‘Remember the times I …..(mentioned what he did)? Doesn’t that show that I love you?’

I have a big heart, but somehow there is just no room for him.

Perhaps one fine day,  I can talk to him like normal friends and not remember the hurtful things that he did to me; yet for now, I guess we just leave it where it is, just like how he decided to give me the cold shoulders few months ago……

p/s: I do know of friends, e.g. yen ru who reads my friendster blog after she receives the notification emails. May I draw your attention of those who is frustrated with the flooding of their inbox due to my ever-active blogging habit? Here is what I suggest you do:

Go to edit profiles> edit accounts> notification settings

under receive notification settings, click NO.

I have a good guess of who will change this, that is, if he ever reads my blog. He is none other than the guy who should be plagued with constant guilt that he has left scars on the hearts of 2 decent girls.

What I can say to him is: You CANNOT hide what you didn’t do, just like you said ‘you cannot win what you can’t lose’ So if you are ‘ng song’ with what I write on the blogs, then start a blog yourself. or go ________!!

( my dear readers, perhaps u all can drop some comments here…hehe and fill in the blanks for me =)

LoveIt is 1.34 a.m. and I just finished watching ‘You have Got Mail’ on tv2. Call me outdated, but I never watched this show though I knew about it when I was in mc. The show is really nice-gives me a warm feeling.Suddenly, the scents of mc and help days overwhelm me; and despite the fact that I should be in bed now, here I am, channeling my thoughts….

It is amazing how our thoughts and views on certain things, i.e. relationsnip(which I am going to talk about here) change over time.

On Liking Someone and Losing the Feelings

Why is it that we never get sick of our best friends of many years, no matter the distance, the lack of communication in certain times, the lack of seeing each other due to this thing called LIFE, the strong bond forged never seem to change. In fact, it only grows stronger with each passing days…

You can not hear from him/her for some time; yet you can just sms/call/mail him/her when you think of her without thinking ‘will it be awkward to drop her/him a msg after my long absence?’

Why is it easy for us to fall out of love when the initial veil of mystery has been uncovered? Why is it we risk taking each other for granted and fall into the comfort zone with time? Why? Why does the person lose its charm after a while, but never our best friends?

On Love at First Sight versus Attraction

Due to popular demands (monica said she heard a discussion on this topic on the radio and the first thing that flashed into her mind was, ‘what is germaine’s view on it? and she told me on msn to blog about it), I would like to share my views on this. And when I use the word sharing, it means a 2-way discussion, I hope  I will be getting views and comments from my supportive readers out there, or just someone who happens to be dropping by. ^_^

The topic of discussion, as told by monica, is How can you tell that it is love at first sight and not a mere attraction? So before we even begin to ponder on it, let me clarify one thing, I do NOT believe in love at first sight. I believe in LOVE AT SECOND SIGHT.

Do allow me to deviate a bit from our main topic yeah. Love to me is a sacred word, a big word indeed. I will not say I have loved any guy before, the ones closer to it will be like. That’s it. Love is so deep, you must have the connection, the chemistry, the sparks, the communication and not living on cloud nince constantly; but being in reality. So how could you love someone at first sight? It is merely due to attraction. I can’t even say I love a guy before though we have been through things together, so I really do not agree with love at first sight.

Love at second sight, is feasible to me. This is because, at first sight, you are attracted by his charm. (Do allow me to say it from the point of a girl, because I want to make things easier by not using ‘his/her’). He needs not be hunky or the most good-looking guy you ever know. But he exudes this aura that make you want to know him better.

So his looks grasps your attention and makes an impact. That, to me, is NOT love. That is a good impression that may lead to love if it is destined to be. With some luck,or shall I say initiative, you get to know him. You talk to him during your first encounter. And no, I still will not call it love no matter how compatible you find you are with him.

With more communications during the second time/ the consecutive time you meet (”love at second sight’ is a mere metaphor, it need NOT be falling in love at exactly the second time you meet him!!), you grow to really know the person. Sparks are flying, gazes have been exchanged, and you feel like nobody has ever clicked so well with you(besides your best friends ^_^), and when you find yourself looking around for him, thinking about him when you are not occupied (usually at night before you go to bed), then it will be love. (gosh love is still a big word to me, but if I use like, people may just dismiss it as the like for a friend so I decide to use ‘love’ instead.)

Alright, back to the point. So how can you tell if it is a love at first sight or a mere attraction? To have a discussion on this, we must acknowledge that love at first sight exists, which I have just stated that I personally do not believe it. But for the sake of monica, I shall just continue the discussion by acknowledging that there is love at first sight.

I guess what differentiates if from attraction is, the person’s face/the way he talks/walks (to sum up, the way he carries himself) gets etched in your mind after the first encounter. After exchange of words in the first encounter, you get this feeling of ‘I feel like I have known him for so long’, you know, something like ‘de ja vu’??

My definition of attraction will be the transient feeling you get when you brush shoulders with a good-looking guy in the library/computer lab. He could make you turn around to steal another glance, but it stops there. By the time you walk out of the library/computer lab, you can’t really picture his face in your mind.

Or it could be the few seconds when your heart beats rapidly when the hunky shop assistant at U2/Topshop/Padini comes to your assistance.

It can even be attraction to celebrities, like how much I am attracted to Won Bin now!!!!

So we cover attraction on looks. There can be attraction on personalities too. And this, is a potential ground for like/love; if the timing is right and chance is beckoning.

Have you ever been so mesmerised by the way someone reasons with you? Even if it is just the first time you get in touch with him due to clubs/ events etc…

Have you had guy friends who are so gentleman, great listener and just know when and where to do the right things?

Have you ever been impressed by how assertive/ persuasive a debater can be?

Have you ever looked up to the popular guy in sports who excels in basketball, tracks and fields, football etc. and yet he has this much-lauded spirit of sportsmanship?

Those are just several attractions based on personalities, to name a few.

When we say love at first sight, the ‘wow factor’ must be there. The aura that the guy exudes must last in you mind long enough for you to admit sheepishly ‘yeah I like love him’ (Notice I am still used to using ‘like’ instead of ‘love’)

Life consists of many grey areas-some make the encounter more mysterious and full of anticipations and expectations; however, some are merely frustrating as they serve as the pretext for irresponsible guys to have ambiguous relationships.

Yet, there is always 2 sides to a coin. If you haven’t gotten the right side, keep tossing. Look around you and you will find so much more in life. My dear girl friends out there, always know you goals in life and never lose sight of them.

Always count your blessings; and when relationship doesn’t go your way, learn from the sucky experience and evolve a stronger person from it. Tell yourself never to let go of the entire forest just because of a rotten tree which ought to be chopped down.

Life is full of uncertainties and surprises; you will have to live life to uncover them. ^_^

Whee!!!! I won consolation prize (RM 25 + certificate + self-satisfaction which is priceless) in the IMU Art Competion–English Poetry!!

While I was weighing the atropine sulphate and phenobarbitone powder during the killer extemporaneous dispensing mock, I got a missed call from Hui Ling, the girl in IMU committee. I then knew that it was a cue for me to go and recite now; so I went out of the lab under the pretext of going to the washroom.

When I was at the atrium, I realised that my name had been called out a few times by the emcee; since I Wasn’t there, they moved on to the next even which was a duet by 2 dudes. They rendered a melting rendition of ‘Mungkin Bila’ ‘Kau Ilhamku’ (Rocks!!!!!!) which won the loud applause of all that were present.

My only friends there were ka keat, teck jian and ben luke (well done to ben again for joining kollam last minute with all his chinese friends who decided to have fun–they emerged as champs!!)
Kk said I could beat him if I was nervous, and NOPE he didn’t get any flowers. ‘I couldn’t find any nice flowers near vista’. *roll my eyes*

But thanks to everyone who was there for me yeah!! I was rather soft because I thought the mike was efficient la; turned out that a mere 4 cm away from my mouth didn’t aimplify my voice as intended. Furthermore, I didnt really succeed in injecting the super bittersweet mood (well you see I sort of dashed down from the lab [thus took some time to get back to normal ventilation rate], and since I knew the truth last week, some feelings just CANNOT be faked okies…) So yeah, I delivered it in a rather ’sad’ manner but then the effect didn’t turn out as I wanted it to be because…well the whole incident is SO YESTERDAY!!!

My consolation prize means a lot to me–mind you exodus, this is different from the ‘consolation prize’ that you gave me- which I rejected because what makes u think that I wouldn’t mind if I rejected 2 people who viewed me as their ‘jackpots’? This is like an appreciation and a recognition of my work!! ^_^

Shin said may be I should become a writer instead of a pharmacist (I am not that good in writing le…) but to tell u all the truth, my dream job is to be a pharmacist-journalist who travels the world, see people, get touched by people and write articles to promote healthcare and disbunk the myths of certain traditional practices among tribes.

Here is an excerpt(that I truly like!!) from the 3rd-prized poem ‘The Girl in My Mirror’, written by a medic student, Mabel. The first-prized poem is ‘Delirium’ (so now u can imagine how the guy recited) and 2nd-prized is ‘Haze’, written by imu own lecturer.

People come and people go,
Flowers wither in a week or so,
Destiny lits up, then starts to fade
And with the passing of time,
Somehow I begin to realize,
That’s how you paint,
The word called "life".

"May I speak to Soo Gian Wan please?’

*before I answered my hp, I knew that it was a call from imu coz it started with ‘86..*

"yes speaking, who is this?"

"I am _____ (forgot what she said-she was so soft) from IMU’

*thinking to myself, doesn’t sound like any lecturer to me or the lady from Academic Affairs Department*

"from which department?"

"I am from the IMU art competition commitee. Congratulations, your poem is one of the 6 poems that is shortlisted. We would like to let you know that the recital is going to be held at 9 plus a.m. tomorrow"

*too stumped. When I joined I didn’t like the idea of reciting poems but then I thought to myself, ‘I only ‘fan’ when I am shortlisted’ *

"Wow I didn’t expect myself to be shortlisted. But I have a mock practical exam tomorrow morning till 12.45 p.m."

"Well I will discussion with the committee and let u know what we can do about it"

The final decision is, I cannot get someone to replace me coz we are graded based on

1. Communication with audience

2. Creativity

3. Voice

I suggest that they change the competition from ‘English Poetry" to "English Poetry Recital". GOodness, I like to write but then I have no clue in reciting!! The girl told me that if I can’t recite it, they will have to choose someone else.

Which means that JUST because I cannot make it for the recital, they are going to upgrade someone’s poem. Do I look like a girl who gives up when the chance is like right in front of her, staring right into her eyes? Even if I do not win, at least I try, and I made it to the top 6 already ^_^

Since I have come this far, I told her that I would take 15 minutes off during my mock dispensing exam (hope I have enough time to finish my work) and dash from the top floor to the ground floor to deliver my poem. I just take it as a quite LONG toilet break then…After all, the dean won’t let me skip a normal practical (marks counted towards final) for IMU debate(representing pharmacy), so since this is an individual  contest, I bet the lecturers will be like "The choice is up to you but then you should always prioritise"

By the way, in the description of the poem, I wrote ‘Reflection of a bittersweet past" (the theme for IMU art competition is ‘Reflection’). However, it is so IRONY that I found out one week ago that it was a BITTERSOUR past. But then again, I will not let my ‘talent’ goes to waste just like that . Like jin said, I may as well earn some cash from the whole zha-dou experience, so just try my best to recite tomorrow.

The only thing I can think of is to be myself, I won’t use those excessive tone or gesture. Just try to think back the memories (minus the betrayal, cheating part) and try to self-induce to bittersweet mood, coz that was the original mindset I had when I was inspired to write that poem. If not, I will try to think of the touching scenes from the korean drama ‘Autumn in My Heart’ and hopefully, the audience can sense my feelings. SO yes that is my strategy…Being creative? I really have no idea what they mean by that okies..and by communicating with audience, I take it as as long as I am able to express to them what I want to convey in the poem, then that is communication….Voice? I will just be myself la!!

kk asked me if he needs to bring leaves and fans for the fallen leaves and wind effect…haha…how thoughtful =P He even asked if I want him to bring flowers so that he can give me after I am done with the recital..aiyo so exaggerating la!!

now, don’t you all wonder what poem I wrote? Out of at least 30 poems, only 6 are shortlisted and I am one of them!! THis is enough to make me happy, really ^_^ The first prizer is RM 100, 2nd Rm75 and 3rd Rm 50. The winners will get a trophy and a certificate too. The $$ factor is what urged me to join in first place, if I get the cash I will head to Perlini’s Silver or Top Shop!!

So my dear girl friends out there, do NOT waste your time crying over spilled milk, even if the guy is at fault, do NOT indulge in self-pity. Instead,channel your energy and effort elsewhere!!!

The poem –"Autumn Wind of July"

The autumn wind of July
Brought together two fallen leaves,
One that fluttered,
From his shoulders to hers,
And from hers to his.

Gazes were exchanged
Smile that melted
A heart or two
How far is the gap-
That is brought closer by words?

The change of seasons
Is witness to the change of fate.
She decided to walk away,
And the fallen leaves that are apart,
Whisper, “ A part is missing”.

The twists of events,
Seem to be life’s uncertainty;
Again, the fallen leaves were reunited,
when two pairs of footsteps
formed a parallel line.

That is not one without gap;
Events followed events that unfold,
Transformation of fate to destiny?
It all seemed so close, yet so far;
Again, she decided to walk away,
In the autumn wind of July.

Memories is but the past,
But there will always be-
An autumn in her heart.

That is the question that Joon Suh used to ask Euh Suh when they were kids.

‘I want to be reborn as a tree, so that I once I have settled down,I won’t move my roots and I can be next to the person I love.’

This is the very same question that he asked another girl he met in varsity, and her answer ‘tree’ caused them to be together, at least for a while till Joon Suh and Euh Suh found each other back again. This is fate. Some things are just meant to be–destiny they said.

Enough about this touching drama (I didn’t cry like how I did in stairways to heaven, I geuss only that guy in stairways can cry so expressively that melted my heart). HOwever, there are the melt-my-heart factors in the korean series ‘Autumn In My Heart’:

Won Bin is so hot!! I can’t stop staring at him in the serise, and yes that is why I have a confession-I just watched the 15th episode despite the fact that I was supposed to study for microbiology lab test tomorrow (I studied while I watched on youtube, multitasking eh?)

So what do I want to be reborn as?
I want to be reborn as an artist. Really, no kidding ok.

I wish I could really paint well, I would love to travel the world and paint whatever picturesque scenes that catch my eyes.

I would love to capture the beauty of nature with the strokes of brush. (NOT like picasso’s style which I can’t comprehend.) Vincent van Gogh is an artist I quite like-his paintings on sceneries are just so nice and I have 2 books of his (given to me by chance). Click HERE for more insight to his famous painting-Sunflower.

In fact, in a korean movie ‘Daisy’ that I like, the artist painted daisies. Daisies mean hidden love. That is like ‘borrowing’ idea from van Gogh’s ‘Sunflower’ , which means ‘gratitude’ in the book I have. I hope I will be able to paint ‘daisies’ during my holidays in december. Ahem, cw you said it is ‘easy’, I want to see how your ‘masterpiece’ can be like!! =P

I would love to draw portrait of my loved ones-my parents, my cute sisters, myself, my future deserving ‘the one’.

I would love to draw portrait or paintings and give them as presents to my close friends.

Like  Shakespeare said in Sonnet 18, ‘So long live thee and this gives life to thee’.

As long as men can appreciate art, my life as an artist will be such a marvellous one!!
 

1. I got addicted to debate lately; fine, addicted is probably an exaggerated word, but I am happy to have discovered my interest in this by chance. I wish I can be 1/4 as assertive, ’stylish’ and ‘make sense’ as the president of the debate society.

2. Things do not aways seem like what they are.

I used to think debaters are those people who can’t stop blabbering (though they do have points)and get on one’s nerves by acting bitchily. Of course, there are still debaters like that but then I really opened up seeing debater who does NOT need to be loud to make his points across.

3. Me channeling my opinion doesn’t mean that I do not think you should have your own opinion. However, me accepting the fact that you are entitled to your own opinion doesn’t mean that I will always respect it/am interested to know about it if it is a JERKY one.

4. I acknowledge that things change, people change. So it is a happy chance that, if we, changing, continue to like a changed person.

I think that it is more acceptable to lose feeling for someone you have had ‘interaction’ with rather than seeing two people at the same time and in the end, decided that one will just be ‘the person whom I always want to GET TO KNOW BETTER and BE FRIENDS with’ (or may be it was a nice way of putting ‘you were my back-up’).

This case is watertight especially on some guy who is SHY, NOT OUTSPOKEN (barely have a different of guy friends to begin with, let alone close buddy girl friends) and undecisive.

A happy note is, a friend of mine was not an email person gave me a pleasant surprise by responding to my mail really promptly!! ^_^ U are one of the most sincere person I have ever known, thanks yk!

5. I miss my uk and aus friends really badly. I miss those ppl who used to have heartfelt talks with me back then in HELP days. I miss mc guys’ cooking.

6. You may interpret my blog in any way, but then people who know me real well know me as the girl who always smile (note: the smile ONLY exudes out when I am talking to/ meeting sincere people) sincere, and is ever sure about what she wants in life.

So I am touched when kk you text me after reading the post, and thanks for all those who showed their concern though it wasn’t a big deal. (the big deal happened 2 freaking years ago as well as months ago).