Loneliness
I was blog-surfing and I came across a post by a famous blogger and what she wrote inspired me to pen out what has been in my mind for some time…
Truth is, festive seasons may just bring out the loneliness among us. It sucks because amidst all the celebrations and all the outings plans, you may feel even more lonely deep down inside.
Just because occasions like new year, xmas, valentines’ day etc. are much celebrated (and commercialised), you are sorta expected to spend that day partying, counting-down, or celebrating with your friends. You all know what I am talking about right? Because people around you all have plans, and it really doesn’t feel good when you have no plans at all.
So you start asking yourself, do you have this group of attached friends that you can always turn to? Like phoebe-monica-chandler (of Friends) that type of stable friends? Someone who will spend the festive seasons with you and celebrate your promotion (or the failure of) with you?
Back then in secondary school, most of us (at least girls) are known to be attached to another friend or friends. It is like A and B, C and D kinda thing. And when you want to pass a message to A and B, you just tell to either one and both of them will get it. Even in bday invitation, it is always nice to invite both A and B because you want to be friendly and not hurt the other’s feelings. Sounds familiar?
Truth is, the attached friends scenario is hard to come by because people have their own lives too. They may have their other halves and other group of friends to hang out with as you all walk a different path in life. Sounds familiar right? Your girlfriend get hitched recently and she spends most of her time with her boyfriend. It is like they cannot afford not to see each other for even one day. Then you have another friend who slowly drifts away from you (not his/her fault) because you two are in different environment and meeting different people, so the topic of conversation starts to get less and less….
It doesn’t make your life any better (if you are one who treasure friendship a lot) when you click with A and B, yet A has his/her group of friends while B has his/her own gang too. And A and B are exactly close so you belong to neither of the gang; yet you share some compatibilities with A and B but you just lack of the chance to spend quality and quantity time with them. I know friendship is not about possession and not about attachment; yet there is always a thought in your heart that you would love to have that particular someone whom you can always count on, and always turn to…
I hope I convey my sentiments in the right way because it is so hard to talk about that feelings which I am sure all of us feel at one point or another..Sometimes amidst a crowd, you feel even more lonely. You feel so lonely deep inside that you want to cry out.
My sis was quick to point out that since primary school, I always have at least a best friend. She didn’t really have one all this while. It is quick true of what she said- look at uncle J,(our family friend who is successful in his career), I don’t think he has many friends whom he can really turn to. That’s why he has aunty (his wife) by his side. Life is like that. Family comes first.
Indeed we spent a joyful xmas night at the top floor of our house, singing carols and doing stupid acts during game time with our sisters.There is no spray, no fireworks, no alcohols- but pure smiles from the faces of our younger sisters. The joy and the warmth, were indeed felt from within.
